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The Aberration Arboretum

The very worst of comics and fanfics, made fun of for your viewing pleasure.



Current Stuff


The New Adventures of Megaman (Novas Aventuras De Megaman)

A Brazilian comic about Mega Man that manages to cram more insanity and shameless fan service into it than most bad fanfics.  With plenty of blood, gore, perversion (including heavy incestual overtones), ham-fisted politics, endless boring fight scenes, and even an attempted hijacking by one of the authors' Mary Sue characters (yes, seriously), it's a disasterpiece of epic proportions that needs to be seen to be believed. Oh, and the real kicker?  This comic was officially sanctioned by Capcom.  Malibu's Street Fighter series didn't meet their quality standards, but this was apparently A-okay!

Issues

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

Lawyer Man


Has mankind created any more vacuous waste of time and brain cells than sprite comics?  Probably.  Is this one any exception to my previous sentence's bit of scorn?  By the author's own admission: No.

Introduction 10 20 30 40 50 60 70 80 88

Rise of the Technoids


Ah, interactive fiction.  Theoretically a way for many authors to collaborate on one big epic story set in a fictional universe, but in practice it always just boils down to a big clusterfuck of each and every author's Mary Sue characters seeking to outdo each other for page time and "cool" factor, regardless of how out of place or unrepentantly stupid they may actually be.   I'd honestly be surprised if anyone ever read one of these for more than five chapters.  Well, besides us, of course, as we have to riff this mess...

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 -Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10

Frozen [Discontinued]

Another of Zero's interactive fictions, and not only is this one arguably worse than the original, it's roughly five times as long and has about thirty times as many author characters in vying for supremacy.  Yes, fanfic is inevitably stupid and painful and terribly written, but rarely does it make for a marathon such as this.  Here but for the sake of boredom go we...

Part 01 - Part 02 - Part 03 - Part 04 - Part 05 - Part 06
Part 07 - Part 08 - Part 09 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12

Like Clockwork

A confused tale of morality and tragedy with a lot of heavy-handed Christian symbolism and some decidedly un-Christian themes like murder, vengeance, evasion of justice and selling one's soul to Satan in exchange for universe-shattering superpowers.  Starring our favorite "dead, back in five minutes" hero, Mr. Zero Diamond.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6

Land of the Titans

A big Zelda-esque adventure starring our old friend Zero and the completely superfluous cast of Earthbound that got all of one fifteenth done and then was quickly forgotten.

The Whole Thing

Xenoshit

More insipid fan work, this time from that annoying kid we all knew who thought that creating poorly drawn MSPaint comics full of gags cribbed from Teen Titans and Family Guy made him god's gift to comedy.  Which I wouldn't particularly care about if their crappy comic were about some forgettable dreck like Inuyasha or something, but instead he chose to butcher one of gaming's finest science fiction serials...

Here we go!

Foppy's Big Day Out [Discontinued]

Not a forgettable John Hughes comedy, but rather another forgettable piece of interactive fiction penned by the Earthbound community circa 1999.  Also starring our old friend Zero "Gary Stu" Diamond!

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The Cheetahmen Comic

Cheetahmen's become pretty well-known over the years as the centerpiece of the notoriously bad Action 52 compilation on the NES.  As did its unreleased sequel Cheetahmen 2, its Genesis counterpart, and even the TV commercial created to promote the game.  One of the rarer pieces of Active Enterprises memorabilia, however, is the comic book created to promote the Cheetahmen.  Active clearly intended for them to become a media franchise on par with the Ninja Turtles, and it would have all began with this comic that came packed in with the game.  Like all things they produced, it tanked due to its low complete absence of quality.  But thanks the magic of the Internet, we can experience it for ourselves without having to pay some scalper on eBay tens of thousands of dollars for a complete copy of one of the worst games of all time, so let's take a look!

Read on!

Street Fighter (the Malibu series)

Capcom is undeniably a legendary company, but their forays into media other than video games have been questionable at best and downright terrible at worst.  Granted, this has improved in recent years with some solid Street Fighter and Mega Man comics by Udon and Archie respectively, but the 90s and 2000s brought us a lot of laughably bad junk based on our favorite franchises.  Some very cheesy Mega Man, Street Fighter and Darkstalkers cartoons, a group of mediocre-to-average licensed comics from Dreamwave, two lousy films based on Street Fighter II, a string of terrible Resident Evil movies that have only the most tenuous of connections to their source material, and of course the infamous Brazilian Mega Man comic written by two people who knew nothing about Mega Man.  One of the first of these many insipid forays was Malibu's Street Fighter comic, a series canned after only three issues because even Capcom thought it was trash.  So let's take a look and see if it's really as bad as it's cracked up to be!

Intro

Femme Fatale

A previously unseen draft of another story starring Frozen's most unlikable protagonist as he... acts like a jackass and not much else!

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Older Stuff

Comics
All written by David Gonterman, the Internet's very own Ed Wood.


Planeswalker

Combining the format of Yu-Gi-Oh! with the lore of Magic the Gathering and Gonterman's own bizarre fetishes.  The result is predictably disasterous.  At one point he pulled the first 30 or so pages from the Internet, leaving only the second half online before eventually removing it completely.


NiGHTS: The Third Dreamer

Made sometime in the twilight of his Sonic/Sailor Moon days, this is Gonterman's take on NiGHTS into Dreams, introducing the 'third Dreamer' (himself) into the story of the Archie comic book based on the game.  The story never really gets off the ground, though, as he only finished a single issue.  Among the rarest of all Gonterman comics on the 'net, as apparently it was pulled only days after it was originally posted.  This copy was salvaged from an old Fortunecity page that I don't think is around anymore;  It's a bit odd to think that I may very well have saved a Gonterman work from being lost forever.



Sonic: The Mobius Chronicles

A comic adaptation/continuation of Blood and Metal, containing more of Gonterman's world-famous angst about paying for the "sins of his forefathers" and trying to establish that Mobius is a future Earth where humanity has been largely wiped out by communism and a mutated AIDS virus (yeah...).  What we've MSTed here is an incomplete copy salvaged by Commuter Barnacle; the original, unaltered files are long lost (although a MSTed version by Jen White is mirrored below).


Livewire Latte

The aimless non-adventures of Adam Packbell and his gynoid companion.  But that doesn't stop David from mixing in his usual insane quirks.


Scarlet PI

A "reimagining" of Foxfire that turns the fursuit characters into products of science (rather than aliens) and Jim Goodlow into a gay man who can't find work as a police officer.  Of course, it's not long before it quickly turns into a mess of fanservice, confused subplots, wildly fluctuating art quality, stolen material and the main plot being lost to Gonterman's weird fantasies.  And of course, like every Gonterman work, it only takes a few dozen pages before Dave gets bored and introduces new projects so he can dump this one and never speak of it again.


Fanfics

SorceryGeniusLina's Shit Piece - Our biggest collaborative teardown to date, a riffing of a fanfic so dreadful it destroyed the space-time continuum, shortened the expected lifespan of the universe by over two trillion years and is directly responsible for all pain and suffering in the world today. Featuring Luffy and Nami transformed into immensely unlikable antiheroes, absolutely no regard for the rest of the cast or the universe it's based on, a narrative ridden with lazy plot contrivances, redundancies and bad cliches in every paragraph, atrocious grammar, punctuation and spelling, and some of the most disgusting scenes I've ever read anywhere, this is Shit Piece. Oh, and the sheer ego of the author doesn't do it any favors, either.

Timespiral - A shitty Final Fantasy X fanfic from the author of infamous garbage pile "Mermaid's Kiss and Siren's Song", which was so good it got a print release!

Pain of the Doubt - A horrendous story that throws incest, ephebophelia and medical/family death drama into the world of Phantom Brave, and not a hint of competent writing or medical knowledge is anywhere to be found.

Marona? A demon? Uhhuh - Another god-awful Phantom Brave story from the same author as the last one, this time turning Marona into a demon (just because) and having her rape everyone she meets (again, just because). So bad that the author took it down out of shame, but the internet never forgets!

Magic of Green - What we have here is a colossal trainwreck of bad grammar, questionable spelling, poor logic, absolutely unbearable rambling prose, completely haphazard and nonsensical series crossovers and the biggest Mary Sue character we've ever witnessed (and yes, that includes David Gonterman at the height of his notoriety). We also take a look at a particularly stinky Duke Nukem 3D mod the author wrote, and some completely hilarious pornography starring Mary Sue and the author's self-insert character.


Other Stuff

Jen White MSTings

Jen White's legendary MSTings of some of Gonterman's earliest comics, salvaged from the scattered remains of Geocities.



MSTron Mirror

Our local mirror of MSTron, a sadly-deceased comic MSTing site that inspired us to start this whole ridiculous chain of making fun of other peoples' work.



Archives

Big archives of most of Gonterman's works and some side-commentary on them.